Melted otter pop.

by slutsunlimited

September 4th 2013

28 weeks pregnant.

Official start of 3rd trimester.



I taught my final pre-Wilder scheduled yoga class last week. It was a bittersweet experience. As much as I know I will appreciate having the extra time, I will really miss my students. Teaching has been an important component in my physical and mental health. Many weeks I have not necessarily felt up to going, but every time I feel so much better afterwards. It has also been truly inspiring to watch the students grow and develop in their personal practice. For my last class we focused on handstands and some of my newer students were amazed that I could still demonstrate a handstand, all the while talking. My goal is to keep up with my personal practice and still be able to do a handstand at nine months. We’ll see how that goes.

One of my dear friends that I’ve known since middle school celebrated her birthday last week, just days after delivering her third son. Although she lives far from New Orleans and our lives have turned out to be very different, we still keep in touch. She has been someone I have always looked up to as a parent because her sons are really smart and well-behaved. Not to mention she and her husband make some of the cutest babies ever. She posted a few of the new baby, Jace, online and I was not at all surprised that he came out looking adorable. Some babies are born ugly; it just happens. I sometimes fear that Wilder will not be as cute as some of my friend’s newborns. But I suppose that as the mother, you typically always find your child cute. Seeing the pictures brought up the discussion with other friends about future plans for Wilder’s first photo shoot. It was decided that we have to do something unique. My dear friend (and fantastic photographer) Gabby Chapin will be at the hospital with us to capture those first moments. After that, I know people are expecting something awesome because both Lee Kyle and I have a habit of going a bit over the top. I’m sure we won’t disappoint.


The eight year anniversary of Katrina occurred last week and I couldn’t help but feel nostalgic. Generally I spend the end of August out of town on the west coast. By this point of the summer like most people, I have had just about enough of the heat and the general malaise that falls over everything. I like to get away right before Decadence and then return for the thrill of the party. Having this breather allows me to come home loving my city and appreciating just how awesome we have it here in New Orleans. This year I was unable to get out of town mostly because I am broke, but also because it wouldn’t have been as much fun. My West Coast lover is currently behind bars where he will be for quite some time and well, I’m six months pregnant. This means that the booze-fueled, swanky-hotel, bad-decision-making would probably amount to pay-per-view on 500 thread count cotton (unsoiled) sheets. I’m not saying I can’t have a good time while sober, I’m just saying I don’t want to pay LA prices for it. So I stayed home and enjoyed the weekend here and listened to others tell their Katrina tales and felt like part of a survivors’ club.  Thinking back on my own experiences, I am reminded to be grateful for all the love and support that I have, as well as the little things like food, water and air conditioning.


I had my standard gestational glucose screening test last week. I had heard a variety of descriptions about this test, ranging from “It’s not bad,” to “I threw up and had to return a different day.” Basically you have five minutes to drink a small container (think school milk carton) of super sweet liquid. Then you hang out for an hour while not eating or drinking at which point they draw your blood. I was provided the orange version of the drink. To me it tasted exactly like a melted version of the Little Orphan Orange Otter Pop. I had no problem slamming the container and honestly was surprised that some women find it so hard. That’s hard, really? Just wait until your baby comes out of your vagina. The nurse who took care of me was awesome and while I can say that the staff at Touro isn’t particularly the quickest at anything, they certainly are the nicest. Because I am Rh- I had to return the following day to receive a RhoGAM shot. I was under the impression that I would just waltz in, get the shot and head on my way. Nope, it didn’t happen like that. First a nurse had to interview me, asking questions that ranged from “What’s your weight?” to “Have you hit your head in the last six hours?” Then they had to call down to the secret place where they keep the coveted elixir. I knew I was going to have to get the shot, but they acted like maybe I wouldn’t for a hot minute. Finally the nurse showed up and stuck me, which produced a burning uncomfortable sensation. I was ready to head out but was instructed that I would have to be monitored for the next 30–45 minutes to ensure I didn’t suffer any adverse effects. I spent that time trying not to fall asleep while watching the various people arrive and depart and making up stories about why they were there. I talked with one of the midwives yesterday and was elated to hear that I do not have gestational diabetes and that everything looked great. Completely worth the inconvenience to know that things are progressing healthily.


Lee Kyle returned from his trip last week and we met up on Thursday night to sign all of our legal paperwork. He was in good spirits considering that his house was robbed. Sadly, someone broke into he and Clint’s place while they were both out. All of their power tools were taken along with several electronics from inside the house including Clint’s camera and computer. Unfortunately, I don’t think that Clint had his computer backed up, so he lost all his memos and photos. That alone would put me into a great depression. Lee Kyle was trying to stay positive about things and was doing a good job. I find his resistance to negativity to be very endearing, and I’m glad he is able to handle setbacks such as these with grace and compassion. I’m not sure I would be able to.  In true New Orleans fashion, we had our dear friend Laura the lawyer meet us at the bar, so that we could sign all of our legal documents. The bartender and barback served as our witnesses and after a few beers (ginger beer for Lee Kyle and me), dinner and a lot of laughing, I was very pleased that everything was taken care of. Hopefully my will and power of attorney will not be needed for a very long time, but it gives me inner peace to know that if something were to happen, we have a plan in order.

I actually made it out this weekend for a social event! I attended Storyville Rising at One Eyed Jacks which was a mixed media show featuring photography, artwork, burlesque, poetry and music. A friend of mine, Jerome Gacula, had his erotic iPhone series up which featured nudes of many New Orleans women including myself. Considering the traffic and parking situation in the Quarter was a mad house due to Decadence, the show was well attended. It was really wonderful to be out and about to see so many of the people whom I adore. The performances were delightful and Jerome was nice enough to let me take my photos when we left for the night. I only made it till a bit past midnight, and then I had to head home because I felt completely exhausted. Andy stayed out to meet up with some friends and I promptly retired to my comfortable bed. It was a fun weekend that reminded me of how lucky I am to live here.


On Monday I officially reached the 28-week mark. This means I am starting my third trimester and we are in the final countdown. In three mere months Wilder will be here and our lives will probably be complete insanity. As much as I am excited to meet him, I am also surprised by how fast this whole thing seems to be going by. I still feel like we have so much left to accomplish before he arrives. New pregnancy experiences include Charlie horses and other bodily soreness at night. Perhaps this later stage of restless nights is just preparation for the sleepless nights that will occur soon enough. When I wake in the morning, everything on my body cracks as if I spent the night building tension in all my joints. Pregnant women are advised to sleep on their left side and I have been trying to accomplish this, but unfortunately I always move due to the pain and numbness this causes after a few hours. My left shoulder is straight up fucked and my IT Band feels like someone has set it ablaze. I’m going to see Misty and have her fix me up. If anyone can handle these problems, I know she can.

This upcoming weekend is the baby shower at Siberia. I am really looking forward to seeing everyone. The weather is cooling down, football season is starting and New Orleanians are getting a spring back in their step. I think it is as good a time as any to be entering the home stretch. Lots of fun and excitement happens here in the fall, which has always been my favorite time of year. Now I’ll have another reason to love it even more.